Slammers Gym is a playground.
Scroll down to read about all the features of our old cop-shop-turned-fitness-facility.
24 / 7 ACCESS
We understand, however, that this schedule doesn’t work for everyone. Some people like to exercise at 3:00 am. Perhaps because that’s when they get off work. Or maybe because they’re bloodsucking nosferatu who would wither away in the sunlight. Whatever the reason, Slammers now offers round-the-clock access.
We are unable, for insurance reasons, to give members unrestricted after-hours access to our entire complex. Members with 24 / 7 fobs or cards, however, are able to use the majority of our upstairs level at any time day or night. If you’re interested in taking advantage of this feature, please come see us at the front counter. Alternately, you can call us at 250-720-2290, email us at reception@slammersgym.ca, message us via Facebook, or express your desire on a tiny scroll of parchment attached to the leg of a carrier pigeon.
PRIVATE
Whatever the reason, it’s fine with us. We’re not Judgey McJudgersons. Members who wish to work out on their own are free to use the private room right next to our main entrance. Thirty minute slots can be booked on the white board by the door on a first-come-first-serve basis. So head on in there to solitary and do your unaccompanied thang. We promise not to peek!
WOMEN'S ONLY
In our experience, Slammers members are almost always considerate and respectful. Even so, we set up a women’s only zone for those who are more comfortable in an exclusively estrogen environment. This space is located in the far corner of our complex’s lower level, away from our high-traffic areas. So if it’s privacy you want, this is the area for you!
BOXING RING
Yep, believe it or not, we have a boxing ring. So if you’d like to put on some gloves and go a few rounds with a sparring buddy, have at ‘er. But listen, no hitting below the belt, no hitting after the bell, and definitely no biting of ears, Mike Tyson!
BASKETBALL HOOPS
So. You’ve just crushed it in the weight room and now you want to get some cardio. But it’s a gorgeous day outside and it seems a shame to spend an hour indoors on the StairMaster. Not to worry. Slammers has a solution: hit the basketball court and soak up some rays whilst you’re draining those treys. Let’s see what you got, Michael Jordan! Actually, forget Jordan. We have a homegrown superstar we can use in our trash-talking instead. Show us your skillz, Steve Nash! {Better, right? True North Strong & Free, we stand on guard for thee!}
Pickleball. It’s fun to say, don’t you think? It always makes us giggle just a li’l. Anyway, we have nets, we have paddles, we have lightweight balls. {More giggling.} Let the pickling commence!
REHAB
In our rehab room, we have a pneumatic workout system that’s ideal for those who are recovering from an injury or a procedure. Rather than having to load on weight plates or adjust pin settings, members using these devices can simply press down with their thumbs to increase or decrease resistance. What this means {assuming you’re willing to forgive a groanworthy pun} is that we’re going to use air pressure to pump you up.
WIFI
PARKING
At Slammers, we have ample room for your ride. Seriously. We have lots in both front and back so you can drive over your 18-wheeler if you like. You’ll still have enough space to do donuts. {Disclaimer: Slammers Gym Inc. does not endorse doing donuts in an 18-wheeler. Injury could result. [But just between us, be sure to get video if you do try it. Because that would be pretty cool.]}
LOUNGES
You’ve had a Kafkaesque day at work. And you need to take five minutes. Just five minutes. Five minutes to decompress before you enter beast mode on the elliptical. That’s where our lounges come in.
You can kick back on the comfy couches upstairs or relax by the fire on our lower level. The sofas on our upper level are right by our fitness classroom so they’re an ideal place to wait for friends who are joining you for yoga or spin. And our chesterfield chill zone downstairs is adjacent to our smoothie bar, so it’s a perfect spot to enjoy a well-deserved Tropical Twister after a solid session of exertion.
GALLERY
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. If that’s true, it’s our pleasure to present a novel’s worth of images of our facility. Ain’t she purty?
